"Is it Wicked to Smile Even When You Feel Like Crying?"

Day after the Fourth, it made me a bit sad when I realized my childhood memories of fireworks, the Lake, lots of food, and huge family, would not be comforting me this year. It's funny what you realize you miss when you don't have them. Although when I am here in CA, I don't really miss very much from back home, Don't get me wrong, I am not a cold hearted snake, but this place seems to keep me busy, or distracted, or something, that I occasionally get homesick, but I count that as a blessing, not a curse. I wouldn't want to be miserably homesick for the sake of looking like I cared.
So these past few weeks have been alot of fun, and alot of work, and my emotions are running crazy, and I am learning some about myself. I have recently come to the conclusion, that I can be incredibly selfish. That is definitely something I want to work on. This morning in chapel, Keith pointed out that in order to be a disciple of Christ, my relationship with my family, friends, and even my relationship with myself, has to seem like hatred, compared to my love relationship with Christ. I have to show my love towards Christ that much more than I do to myself. Wow. that put me in my place, Just take a moment to reflect on all the things that you do for yourself, than compare it to what you are doing for Christ and to show your love for him. I have a big project ahead of me.